too bad you live with your parents still
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I don't want my vagina anymore.
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