so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
