We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
