But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
