I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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