She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
so much tequila, so little girl.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
