But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
