Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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