I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
This can only be settled by a dance off.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
