I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
