Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
