I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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