Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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