Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
