its not stalking. its research.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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