After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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