She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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