Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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