Whod you bang
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
