it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
My breasts were aching with rage.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
