Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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