He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
