Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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