Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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