Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
