I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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