I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
