69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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