How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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