That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
