Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
It's just like the Real World with babies
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
