is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
