ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
