He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
