I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
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