Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
