I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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