hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
