i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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