if i died would you start the facebook group?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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