the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
she was so not down for the gang bang
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
