what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
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