i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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