Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
