so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
