Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
