I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize