my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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