Someone shit on the floor
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
