The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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