Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
